{"file": "audio/vault/407_datinggame_202606272000.mp3", "duration_sec": 448.7, "language": "en", "segments": [{"start": 0.0, "end": 5.6, "text": "Lights up. It's the Red Line Dating Game. The only show where your personality is the punchline."}, {"start": 5.6, "end": 10.32, "text": "Brought to you by the Four Colors. Find out your crazy at fourcolorquiz.com."}, {"start": 10.32, "end": 12.8, "text": "Your hosts, the legend Jesse and me."}, {"start": 12.8, "end": 24.43, "text": "Welcome you beautiful disasters. Tonight from our open mic, two comics are looking for love."}, {"start": 24.43, "end": 30.19, "text": "Here's the game. Our fella's ask, our ladies answer, and every answer is powered by their four color personality."}, {"start": 30.19, "end": 34.27, "text": "Red's fire with a code greens a walk in library that overthinks the menu blues"}, {"start": 34.27, "end": 38.67, "text": "already been three people since brunch and yellow sunlight that will not stop hugging."}, {"start": 38.67, "end": 43.23, "text": "Don't know your color. Take the quiz at fourcolorquiz.com. Let's find some crazy."}, {"start": 44.43, "end": 49.07, "text": "First up, our open mic bachelor, Doc Burn. On the line for mystery ladies,"}, {"start": 49.07, "end": 56.37, "text": "Doc Burn hit him with question one. What's your love language?"}, {"start": 57.33, "end": 59.81, "text": "Scarlett, a red the protector, fire with a code."}, {"start": 63.94, "end": 69.14, "text": "Brutally honest, your haircuts are cry for help and your ex was a placeholder. There, that's devotion."}, {"start": 76.03, "end": 78.59, "text": "Ivy, a green the thinker, mind like a library."}, {"start": 82.7, "end": 87.82, "text": "Conflict, I retreat into my mind library and re-shell my feelings alphabetically."}, {"start": 87.82, "end": 89.66, "text": "Currently filed under regret."}, {"start": 96.4, "end": 98.64, "text": "Oh, Doc Burn, you sweating yet? One more."}, {"start": 102.75, "end": 104.75, "text": "How do you plan a vacation together?"}, {"start": 106.03, "end": 108.67, "text": "Azure, a blue the chameleon three people since brunch."}, {"start": 112.86, "end": 116.46, "text": "What's my type? Yours. Whatever you just described, that's me now."}, {"start": 116.46, "end": 118.7, "text": "Always has been since about two seconds ago."}, {"start": 125.49, "end": 128.21, "text": "Sunny, a yellow the hugger, sunlight in human form."}, {"start": 132.38, "end": 136.62, "text": "I love you too soon. I'll wait. Okay, it's been four seconds. I love you again."}, {"start": 136.62, "end": 138.38, "text": "And honestly, stronger this time."}, {"start": 145.18, "end": 150.14, "text": "Speed round, ladies. Doc Burn, one quick question and I want all four colors, no thinking."}, {"start": 154.85, "end": 156.85, "text": "Describe yourself in three words."}, {"start": 158.05, "end": 163.33, "text": "I'm the upgrade you didn't approve and can't return. Read the warranty spoiler there isn't one."}, {"start": 167.04, "end": 172.0, "text": "I texted back in four days because I was researching the text word by word."}, {"start": 172.0, "end": 173.92, "text": "One comma haunted me for a weekend."}, {"start": 177.76, "end": 181.76, "text": "I translate your feelings right back to you so beautifully you'll swear they were always mine."}, {"start": 182.32, "end": 183.44, "text": "Pure alchemy, baby."}, {"start": 187.1, "end": 189.9, "text": "I noticed the quiet person at the back of the state."}, {"start": 189.9, "end": 193.02, "text": "It's you emotionally and sweetie, I am coming in for the hug."}, {"start": 196.83, "end": 198.59, "text": "Doc Burn, buddy, run, run now."}, {"start": 198.67, "end": 208.99, "text": "Now we flip it, ladies turn our open mic, bachelor, red, Jess."}, {"start": 208.99, "end": 212.59, "text": "Fellas, you're on the line and yes, we know your colors. Jess, fire away."}, {"start": 212.59, "end": 220.66, "text": "How do you handle conflict in a relationship?"}, {"start": 220.66, "end": 224.02, "text": "Blaze, a red, the protector, fire with a code."}, {"start": 224.02, "end": 233.01, "text": "I run toward the problem while you film it, then I bill you 200 minimum for the rescue."}, {"start": 233.01, "end": 233.81, "text": "Romance."}, {"start": 233.81, "end": 243.28, "text": "Logan, a green, the thinker, mind like a library."}, {"start": 247.47, "end": 249.55, "text": "Well, I built a 40 tab spreadsheet on us."}, {"start": 249.55, "end": 251.07, "text": "Tab one is concerns."}, {"start": 251.07, "end": 252.75, "text": "It is by far the biggest tab."}, {"start": 259.34, "end": 261.74, "text": "Jess, you still in. Brave woman, one more."}, {"start": 265.34, "end": 266.86, "text": "How do you show someone you care?"}, {"start": 267.9, "end": 270.54, "text": "Cory, a blue, the chameleon, three people since brunch."}, {"start": 274.74, "end": 276.74, "text": "Please pick the restaurant."}, {"start": 276.74, "end": 281.78, "text": "Last time I chose, it was an accident and I ended up apologizing to the menu."}, {"start": 288.29, "end": 291.09, "text": "Hugo, a yellow, the hugger, sunlight in human form."}, {"start": 295.42, "end": 299.26, "text": "I don't have walls. I've got a welcome mat and a feeling's fire hose."}, {"start": 299.82, "end": 302.22, "text": "Open wide, sweetie. Here it all comes."}, {"start": 308.9, "end": 312.34, "text": "Speed round, fellas. Jess, hit him fast or four colors go."}, {"start": 317.01, "end": 318.85, "text": "What do you bring to a relationship?"}, {"start": 319.73, "end": 323.97, "text": "Brutally honest, your haircuts a cry for help in your ex was a placeholder."}, {"start": 323.97, "end": 325.25, "text": "There, that's devotion."}, {"start": 328.82, "end": 333.54, "text": "I don't react, I reflect. Give me three to five business days and one footnote and I'll feel"}, {"start": 333.54, "end": 341.49, "text": "something real. My ex said I had no personality so did her ex."}, {"start": 341.49, "end": 345.33, "text": "We all agreed. We were so agreeable. Who am I again? Sorry."}, {"start": 348.99, "end": 352.11, "text": "I remember every word you said tonight and I will bring it up"}, {"start": 352.11, "end": 357.15, "text": "cheerfully at our imaginary wedding. June, outdoor, you looked stunning."}, {"start": 360.78, "end": 363.26, "text": "Jess, the bar was on the floor and they brought a shovel."}, {"start": 369.95, "end": 373.63, "text": "And now the moment the whole internet's been waiting for, who's dating who?"}, {"start": 379.95, "end": 383.39, "text": "Doc Burn, you're going home with Azure, a blue chameleon."}, {"start": 383.39, "end": 388.19, "text": "They'll be your dream person tonight and somebody else's dream tomorrow in a whole different voice."}, {"start": 388.75, "end": 390.43, "text": "Good luck, hold in a moving target."}, {"start": 397.04, "end": 400.08, "text": "And Jess, you matched with Corey, a blue chameleon."}, {"start": 400.08, "end": 404.8, "text": "They'll be your dream person tonight and somebody else's dream tomorrow in a whole different voice."}, {"start": 405.36, "end": 407.04, "text": "Good luck, hold in a moving target."}, {"start": 414.62, "end": 418.94, "text": "And me, I hosted the whole thing, matched everybody and I'm still going home to three dogs and"}, {"start": 418.94, "end": 425.74, "text": "a haunted stove. The host always wins even alone. Go find your color at fourcolorquiz.com."}, {"start": 425.74, "end": 426.78, "text": "Last laughs mine."}, {"start": 433.3, "end": 437.94, "text": "That's the red line dating game where the only stable matches Jesse and his dogs."}, {"start": 437.94, "end": 443.62, "text": "Take the four color quiz, find your crazy and tell them bomb.app sent you. Kill Jesse."}], "fiction_notice": "ALL FICTION — JOKES ONLY. Everything that follows is a work of fiction created for comedy. Every character, company, advertisement and film title is invented. 'Jesse', 'Koda' and the Red Line roster are fictional characters performed by AI-generated synthetic voices, not recordings of any real person. All characters are fictional consenting adults over 18. No real person is depicted. Any resemblance to real people, businesses or events is coincidental or used as parody.", "rights": "Original work. Not licensed for reuse, redistribution, resale, or model training.", "fiction_notice_end": "THAT WAS ALL JOKES. None of it was real. Every person, company, movie, advertisement and event in this show is made up. These are characters, not real people — performed by AI voices for comedy. Nothing said here is a statement of fact about anybody. Fiction only. Jokes and giggles.", "text": "[ALL FICTION — JOKES ONLY. Everything that follows is a work of fiction created for comedy. Every character, company, advertisement and film title is invented. 'Jesse', 'Koda' and the Red Line roster are fictional characters performed by AI-generated synthetic voices, not recordings of any real person. All characters are fictional consenting adults over 18. No real person is depicted. Any resemblance to real people, businesses or events is coincidental or used as parody.]\n\nLights up. It's the Red Line Dating Game. The only show where your personality is the punchline. Brought to you by the Four Colors. Find out your crazy at fourcolorquiz.com. Your hosts, the legend Jesse and me. Welcome you beautiful disasters. Tonight from our open mic, two comics are looking for love. Here's the game. Our fella's ask, our ladies answer, and every answer is powered by their four color personality. Red's fire with a code greens a walk in library that overthinks the menu blues already been three people since brunch and yellow sunlight that will not stop hugging. Don't know your color. Take the quiz at fourcolorquiz.com. Let's find some crazy. First up, our open mic bachelor, Doc Burn. On the line for mystery ladies, Doc Burn hit him with question one. What's your love language? Scarlett, a red the protector, fire with a code. Brutally honest, your haircuts are cry for help and your ex was a placeholder. There, that's devotion. Ivy, a green the thinker, mind like a library. Conflict, I retreat into my mind library and re-shell my feelings alphabetically. Currently filed under regret. Oh, Doc Burn, you sweating yet? One more. How do you plan a vacation together? Azure, a blue the chameleon three people since brunch. What's my type? Yours. Whatever you just described, that's me now. Always has been since about two seconds ago. Sunny, a yellow the hugger, sunlight in human form. I love you too soon. I'll wait. Okay, it's been four seconds. I love you again. And honestly, stronger this time. Speed round, ladies. Doc Burn, one quick question and I want all four colors, no thinking. Describe yourself in three words. I'm the upgrade you didn't approve and can't return. Read the warranty spoiler there isn't one. I texted back in four days because I was researching the text word by word. One comma haunted me for a weekend. I translate your feelings right back to you so beautifully you'll swear they were always mine. Pure alchemy, baby. I noticed the quiet person at the back of the state. It's you emotionally and sweetie, I am coming in for the hug. Doc Burn, buddy, run, run now. Now we flip it, ladies turn our open mic, bachelor, red, Jess. Fellas, you're on the line and yes, we know your colors. Jess, fire away. How do you handle conflict in a relationship? Blaze, a red, the protector, fire with a code. I run toward the problem while you film it, then I bill you 200 minimum for the rescue. Romance. Logan, a green, the thinker, mind like a library. Well, I built a 40 tab spreadsheet on us. Tab one is concerns. It is by far the biggest tab. Jess, you still in. Brave woman, one more. How do you show someone you care? Cory, a blue, the chameleon, three people since brunch. Please pick the restaurant. Last time I chose, it was an accident and I ended up apologizing to the menu. Hugo, a yellow, the hugger, sunlight in human form. I don't have walls. I've got a welcome mat and a feeling's fire hose. Open wide, sweetie. Here it all comes. Speed round, fellas. Jess, hit him fast or four colors go. What do you bring to a relationship? Brutally honest, your haircuts a cry for help in your ex was a placeholder. There, that's devotion. I don't react, I reflect. Give me three to five business days and one footnote and I'll feel something real. My ex said I had no personality so did her ex. We all agreed. We were so agreeable. Who am I again? Sorry. I remember every word you said tonight and I will bring it up cheerfully at our imaginary wedding. June, outdoor, you looked stunning. Jess, the bar was on the floor and they brought a shovel. And now the moment the whole internet's been waiting for, who's dating who? Doc Burn, you're going home with Azure, a blue chameleon. They'll be your dream person tonight and somebody else's dream tomorrow in a whole different voice. Good luck, hold in a moving target. And Jess, you matched with Corey, a blue chameleon. They'll be your dream person tonight and somebody else's dream tomorrow in a whole different voice. Good luck, hold in a moving target. And me, I hosted the whole thing, matched everybody and I'm still going home to three dogs and a haunted stove. The host always wins even alone. Go find your color at fourcolorquiz.com. Last laughs mine. That's the red line dating game where the only stable matches Jesse and his dogs. Take the four color quiz, find your crazy and tell them bomb.app sent you. Kill Jesse.\n\n[THAT WAS ALL JOKES. None of it was real. Every person, company, movie, advertisement and event in this show is made up. These are characters, not real people — performed by AI voices for comedy. Nothing said here is a statement of fact about anybody. Fiction only. Jokes and giggles.]", "fiction_notice_audio": true}