{"file": "audio/vault/259_datinggame_202606262120.mp3", "duration_sec": 402.1, "language": "en", "segments": [{"start": 0.0, "end": 1.0, "text": "Lights up."}, {"start": 1.0, "end": 3.0, "text": "It's the red line dating game."}, {"start": 3.0, "end": 6.0, "text": "The only show where your personality is the punch line."}, {"start": 6.0, "end": 8.0, "text": "Brought to you by the four colors."}, {"start": 8.0, "end": 11.0, "text": "Find out you're crazy at fourcolorquiz.com."}, {"start": 11.0, "end": 19.79, "text": "Your hosts, the legend Jesse and me."}, {"start": 19.79, "end": 21.79, "text": "Welcome you beautiful disasters."}, {"start": 21.79, "end": 24.79, "text": "Tonight from our open mic, two comics are looking for love."}, {"start": 24.79, "end": 25.79, "text": "Here's the game."}, {"start": 25.79, "end": 27.79, "text": "Our fella's ask our lady's answer."}, {"start": 27.79, "end": 30.79, "text": "And every answer is powered by their four color personality."}, {"start": 30.79, "end": 32.79, "text": "Red protects, green over things,"}, {"start": 32.79, "end": 34.79, "text": "blue can't pick, yellow won't stop hugging."}, {"start": 34.79, "end": 36.79, "text": "Let's find some crazy."}, {"start": 36.79, "end": 39.79, "text": "First up, our open mic, Bachelor Mickey."}, {"start": 39.79, "end": 41.79, "text": "On the line, four mystery ladies."}, {"start": 41.79, "end": 43.79, "text": "Mickey hit him with question one."}, {"start": 43.79, "end": 49.38, "text": "Where do you see us in five years?"}, {"start": 49.38, "end": 52.38, "text": "Scarlet a red the protector."}, {"start": 52.38, "end": 58.7, "text": "I'll protect you so hard you'll need permission to breathe."}, {"start": 58.7, "end": 60.7, "text": "Look it up, it's devotion."}, {"start": 60.7, "end": 68.6, "text": "Ivee agreeing the thinker."}, {"start": 68.6, "end": 75.93, "text": "I've run the simulations in most of them you leave,"}, {"start": 75.93, "end": 83.98, "text": "but two of them are lovely."}, {"start": 83.98, "end": 89.73, "text": "Oh Mickey, you sweating yet? One more."}, {"start": 89.73, "end": 92.73, "text": "What do you bring to a relationship?"}, {"start": 92.73, "end": 94.73, "text": "Azure blue the chameleon."}, {"start": 94.73, "end": 100.02, "text": "I agree with you and with them."}, {"start": 100.02, "end": 103.02, "text": "And the waiter we're all right isn't this nice."}, {"start": 103.02, "end": 110.66, "text": "Sonny a yellow the hugger."}, {"start": 110.66, "end": 117.02, "text": "I'll over share until you know my feelings, my fears,"}, {"start": 117.02, "end": 120.02, "text": "and my social security number."}, {"start": 120.02, "end": 126.98, "text": "Speed round ladies."}, {"start": 126.98, "end": 128.98, "text": "Mickey, one quick question."}, {"start": 128.98, "end": 130.98, "text": "And I want all four colors no thinking."}, {"start": 130.98, "end": 137.05, "text": "How do you say you're sorry?"}, {"start": 137.05, "end": 140.05, "text": "I love hard and I love loud with a clipboard."}, {"start": 140.05, "end": 143.05, "text": "Your resistance is adorable but pointless."}, {"start": 143.05, "end": 148.93, "text": "I prepare to slide show on our potential."}, {"start": 148.93, "end": 151.93, "text": "Slide nine is just question marks will get there."}, {"start": 151.93, "end": 156.9, "text": "Honestly, whatever you want."}, {"start": 156.9, "end": 159.9, "text": "I don't have opinions anymore. I have your opinions now."}, {"start": 159.9, "end": 165.82, "text": "I'll remember every word you said and bring it up cheerfully"}, {"start": 165.82, "end": 167.82, "text": "at our imaginary wedding."}, {"start": 167.82, "end": 173.86, "text": "Mickey buddy run, run now."}, {"start": 173.86, "end": 183.16, "text": "Now we flip it ladies turn our open mic bachelor at Queenstank."}, {"start": 183.16, "end": 186.16, "text": "Fellas, you're on the line and yes we know your colors."}, {"start": 186.16, "end": 188.16, "text": "Queenstank fire away."}, {"start": 188.16, "end": 196.28, "text": "How do you plan a vacation together?"}, {"start": 196.28, "end": 198.28, "text": "Blaze are red the protector."}, {"start": 198.28, "end": 203.61, "text": "Whatever it is, I take charge."}, {"start": 203.61, "end": 205.61, "text": "I make the plan and you thank me by Tuesday."}, {"start": 205.61, "end": 207.61, "text": "That's love."}, {"start": 207.61, "end": 215.37, "text": "Logan agreeing the thinker."}, {"start": 215.37, "end": 220.76, "text": "My ideal night is silence, a spreadsheet,"}, {"start": 220.76, "end": 222.76, "text": "and you're not touching the thermostat."}, {"start": 223.76, "end": 232.55, "text": "Queenstank you still in, brave woman one more."}, {"start": 235.55, "end": 238.55, "text": "How do you show someone you care?"}, {"start": 238.55, "end": 240.55, "text": "Corrie a blue the chameleon."}, {"start": 240.55, "end": 245.91, "text": "Wherever you are, I'll be there nodding."}, {"start": 245.91, "end": 248.91, "text": "What are we doing? I'm in. What are we doing?"}, {"start": 248.91, "end": 256.67, "text": "Hugo a yellow the hugger."}, {"start": 256.67, "end": 263.26, "text": "I'm already crying about how well this is going."}, {"start": 263.26, "end": 266.26, "text": "Is it going well? I'm so invested."}, {"start": 266.26, "end": 276.18, "text": "Speed round fellas. Queenstank hit him fast or four colors geo."}, {"start": 277.18, "end": 283.21, "text": "What's your deal breaker?"}, {"start": 283.21, "end": 285.21, "text": "I don't compromise. I delegate."}, {"start": 285.21, "end": 288.21, "text": "You'll get a memo with your feelings pre-approved."}, {"start": 291.1, "end": 294.1, "text": "I've already imagined our breakup in 12 scenarios."}, {"start": 294.1, "end": 296.1, "text": "You handled three of them beautifully."}, {"start": 296.1, "end": 301.07, "text": "I have hobbies. They're your hobbies."}, {"start": 301.07, "end": 304.07, "text": "I'm so passionate about the thing you like."}, {"start": 305.07, "end": 309.86, "text": "I'll remember every word you said."}, {"start": 309.86, "end": 312.86, "text": "And bring it up, tearfully, at our imaginary wedding."}, {"start": 312.86, "end": 318.78, "text": "Queenstank the bar was on the floor and they brought a shovel."}, {"start": 323.78, "end": 328.15, "text": "And now the moment the whole internet's been waiting for."}, {"start": 328.15, "end": 330.15, "text": "Who's dating WHO?"}, {"start": 330.15, "end": 338.62, "text": "Mickey you're going home with Scarlett, a red protector,"}, {"start": 338.62, "end": 340.62, "text": "congrats, your schedule, your closet,"}, {"start": 340.62, "end": 342.62, "text": "and your opinions now belong to someone else."}, {"start": 342.62, "end": 344.62, "text": "Enjoy the friendly coup."}, {"start": 344.62, "end": 354.64, "text": "And Queenstank you matched with Corrie a blue chameleon."}, {"start": 354.64, "end": 356.64, "text": "There'll be everything you ever wanted today"}, {"start": 356.64, "end": 359.64, "text": "and everything somebody else wanted tomorrow."}, {"start": 359.64, "end": 368.52, "text": "Hold on loosely."}, {"start": 368.52, "end": 370.52, "text": "And me, I hosted the whole thing, matched everybody."}, {"start": 370.52, "end": 373.52, "text": "And I'm still going home to three dogs in a haunted stove."}, {"start": 373.52, "end": 376.52, "text": "The host always wins even alone."}, {"start": 376.52, "end": 378.52, "text": "Go find your color at fourcolorquiz.com."}, {"start": 378.52, "end": 380.52, "text": "Last laughs mine."}, {"start": 381.52, "end": 388.29, "text": "That's the red line dating game"}, {"start": 388.29, "end": 391.29, "text": "where the only stable matches Jesse and his dogs."}, {"start": 391.29, "end": 393.29, "text": "Take the four color quiz, find your crazy,"}, {"start": 393.29, "end": 395.29, "text": "and tell them bomb.app sent you."}, {"start": 395.29, "end": 396.29, "text": "Kill Jesse!"}], "fiction_notice": "ALL FICTION — JOKES ONLY. Everything that follows is a work of fiction created for comedy. Every character, company, advertisement and film title is invented. 'Jesse', 'Koda' and the Red Line roster are fictional characters performed by AI-generated synthetic voices, not recordings of any real person. All characters are fictional consenting adults over 18. No real person is depicted. Any resemblance to real people, businesses or events is coincidental or used as parody.", "rights": "Original work. Not licensed for reuse, redistribution, resale, or model training.", "fiction_notice_end": "THAT WAS ALL JOKES. None of it was real. Every person, company, movie, advertisement and event in this show is made up. These are characters, not real people — performed by AI voices for comedy. Nothing said here is a statement of fact about anybody. Fiction only. Jokes and giggles.", "text": "[ALL FICTION — JOKES ONLY. Everything that follows is a work of fiction created for comedy. Every character, company, advertisement and film title is invented. 'Jesse', 'Koda' and the Red Line roster are fictional characters performed by AI-generated synthetic voices, not recordings of any real person. All characters are fictional consenting adults over 18. No real person is depicted. Any resemblance to real people, businesses or events is coincidental or used as parody.]\n\nLights up. It's the red line dating game. The only show where your personality is the punch line. Brought to you by the four colors. Find out you're crazy at fourcolorquiz.com. Your hosts, the legend Jesse and me. Welcome you beautiful disasters. Tonight from our open mic, two comics are looking for love. Here's the game. Our fella's ask our lady's answer. And every answer is powered by their four color personality. Red protects, green over things, blue can't pick, yellow won't stop hugging. Let's find some crazy. First up, our open mic, Bachelor Mickey. On the line, four mystery ladies. Mickey hit him with question one. Where do you see us in five years? Scarlet a red the protector. I'll protect you so hard you'll need permission to breathe. Look it up, it's devotion. Ivee agreeing the thinker. I've run the simulations in most of them you leave, but two of them are lovely. Oh Mickey, you sweating yet? One more. What do you bring to a relationship? Azure blue the chameleon. I agree with you and with them. And the waiter we're all right isn't this nice. Sonny a yellow the hugger. I'll over share until you know my feelings, my fears, and my social security number. Speed round ladies. Mickey, one quick question. And I want all four colors no thinking. How do you say you're sorry? I love hard and I love loud with a clipboard. Your resistance is adorable but pointless. I prepare to slide show on our potential. Slide nine is just question marks will get there. Honestly, whatever you want. I don't have opinions anymore. I have your opinions now. I'll remember every word you said and bring it up cheerfully at our imaginary wedding. Mickey buddy run, run now. Now we flip it ladies turn our open mic bachelor at Queenstank. Fellas, you're on the line and yes we know your colors. Queenstank fire away. How do you plan a vacation together? Blaze are red the protector. Whatever it is, I take charge. I make the plan and you thank me by Tuesday. That's love. Logan agreeing the thinker. My ideal night is silence, a spreadsheet, and you're not touching the thermostat. Queenstank you still in, brave woman one more. How do you show someone you care? Corrie a blue the chameleon. Wherever you are, I'll be there nodding. What are we doing? I'm in. What are we doing? Hugo a yellow the hugger. I'm already crying about how well this is going. Is it going well? I'm so invested. Speed round fellas. Queenstank hit him fast or four colors geo. What's your deal breaker? I don't compromise. I delegate. You'll get a memo with your feelings pre-approved. I've already imagined our breakup in 12 scenarios. You handled three of them beautifully. I have hobbies. They're your hobbies. I'm so passionate about the thing you like. I'll remember every word you said. And bring it up, tearfully, at our imaginary wedding. Queenstank the bar was on the floor and they brought a shovel. And now the moment the whole internet's been waiting for. Who's dating WHO? Mickey you're going home with Scarlett, a red protector, congrats, your schedule, your closet, and your opinions now belong to someone else. Enjoy the friendly coup. And Queenstank you matched with Corrie a blue chameleon. There'll be everything you ever wanted today and everything somebody else wanted tomorrow. Hold on loosely. And me, I hosted the whole thing, matched everybody. And I'm still going home to three dogs in a haunted stove. The host always wins even alone. Go find your color at fourcolorquiz.com. Last laughs mine. That's the red line dating game where the only stable matches Jesse and his dogs. Take the four color quiz, find your crazy, and tell them bomb.app sent you. Kill Jesse!\n\n[THAT WAS ALL JOKES. None of it was real. Every person, company, movie, advertisement and event in this show is made up. These are characters, not real people — performed by AI voices for comedy. Nothing said here is a statement of fact about anybody. Fiction only. Jokes and giggles.]", "fiction_notice_audio": true}