{"file": "audio/vault/110_everyone_else_script.mp3", "duration_sec": 219.9, "language": "en", "segments": [{"start": 4.14, "end": 8.34, "text": "In a world where one man turned his entire breakdown into a business model,"}, {"start": 8.34, "end": 11.34, "text": "welcome to the Red Line Comedy Club."}, {"start": 11.34, "end": 15.94, "text": "Tonight, the only stage on Earth where the headliner pays to get destroyed,"}, {"start": 15.94, "end": 19.04, "text": "featuring a lineup of comedians who are technically software"}, {"start": 19.04, "end": 21.74, "text": "and one man who is technically a cautionary tale."}, {"start": 21.74, "end": 23.74, "text": "This is Kill Jesse."}, {"start": 23.74, "end": 25.24, "text": "Please silence your phones."}, {"start": 25.24, "end": 26.74, "text": "We tried to silence him."}, {"start": 26.74, "end": 28.24, "text": "It did not take."}, {"start": 28.24, "end": 33.84, "text": "Here's the part that'll mess you up, folks."}, {"start": 33.84, "end": 35.74, "text": "My parents could have prevented all of it."}, {"start": 35.74, "end": 39.84, "text": "The felony, the mess, the kid who went off the rails at 19, they could have stopped it."}, {"start": 39.84, "end": 44.34, "text": "But they were too busy and not too busy with nothing, too busy helping everyone else."}, {"start": 44.34, "end": 48.54, "text": "My whole life, my parents were the most generous people in the world to strangers."}, {"start": 48.54, "end": 51.54, "text": "Everybody else got their time, their money, their attention."}, {"start": 51.54, "end": 54.54, "text": "I got the leftovers and a ride to court."}, {"start": 54.54, "end": 64.02, "text": "He's not a real doctor, but neither was the guy who did your tattoos."}, {"start": 64.02, "end": 67.02, "text": "The roast physician is in Doc Burn."}, {"start": 70.16, "end": 74.66, "text": "Jesse, your parents adopted the whole neighborhood and forgot the kid in the house."}, {"start": 74.66, "end": 86.18, "text": "They'd give the shirt off their back to a stranger while I stood there cold, asking for a jacket."}, {"start": 86.18, "end": 89.38, "text": "I wasn't unloved, folks. I was just never first."}, {"start": 89.38, "end": 93.08, "text": "I'm the one kid who had to make an appointment to be in his own family."}, {"start": 93.08, "end": 101.27, "text": "That's the cruelest one, Jesse. The good guy, parents."}, {"start": 101.27, "end": 106.49, "text": "Everybody loves him except the kid who actually needed him."}, {"start": 106.49, "end": 108.69, "text": "No filter, no mercy, no chill."}, {"start": 108.69, "end": 115.26, "text": "All hail the Queen of the Burn Unit, Queen Stank."}, {"start": 115.36, "end": 119.56, "text": "Jesse, your parents were saints to the whole world and ghosts to you."}, {"start": 119.56, "end": 128.74, "text": "That's a haunting with a casserole."}, {"start": 128.74, "end": 131.14, "text": "And here's the truth, you beautiful Rex."}, {"start": 131.14, "end": 133.44, "text": "The hardest pain isn't the parents who were cruel."}, {"start": 133.44, "end": 135.44, "text": "It's the parents who were kind, just never to you."}, {"start": 135.44, "end": 137.94, "text": "They had endless love. I just wasn't on the list."}, {"start": 137.94, "end": 142.94, "text": "So I grew up learning that to be loved, you got to earn your way to the front of a line that is always full."}, {"start": 142.94, "end": 146.44, "text": "And maybe that's why I built a whole empire screaming into a microphone."}, {"start": 146.44, "end": 149.94, "text": "Because somewhere in me, there's still a kid going, hey, I'm here too."}, {"start": 149.94, "end": 151.94, "text": "Well, I'm here now."}, {"start": 152.04, "end": 153.84, "text": "And tonight for once, I'm first."}, {"start": 153.84, "end": 155.54, "text": "The hero gets the last laugh."}, {"start": 155.54, "end": 157.34, "text": "And he finally got the front of the line."}, {"start": 157.34, "end": 172.02, "text": "This is Red Line, kill Jesse. Good night."}, {"start": 172.02, "end": 174.52, "text": "And that is our show."}, {"start": 174.52, "end": 180.42, "text": "But the red line never closes every minute of every hour of every single day."}, {"start": 180.42, "end": 182.62, "text": "A brand new comic steps up."}, {"start": 182.62, "end": 188.22, "text": "And another piece of this man's dignity steps down 24 hours, seven days a week."}, {"start": 188.22, "end": 191.82, "text": "Fresh stand up, freshly roasted, never reheated."}, {"start": 191.82, "end": 193.82, "text": "Can't sleep. We're up."}, {"start": 193.82, "end": 195.12, "text": "Going through something."}, {"start": 195.12, "end": 197.22, "text": "So is he always."}, {"start": 197.22, "end": 199.62, "text": "So come back, you beautiful degenerates."}, {"start": 199.62, "end": 204.62, "text": "Go to bombed.app and let the machine make you laugh before the dark wins."}, {"start": 204.62, "end": 207.22, "text": "The Red Line Comedy Club. Open all night."}, {"start": 207.22, "end": 211.22, "text": "Because somewhere out there, it is always Jesse's fault."}, {"start": 211.22, "end": 213.72, "text": "Subscribe. He needs the attention."}, {"start": 213.72, "end": 214.72, "text": "Good night."}], "fiction_notice": "ALL FICTION — JOKES ONLY. Everything that follows is a work of fiction created for comedy. Every character, company, advertisement and film title is invented. 'Jesse', 'Koda' and the Red Line roster are fictional characters performed by AI-generated synthetic voices, not recordings of any real person. All characters are fictional consenting adults over 18. No real person is depicted. Any resemblance to real people, businesses or events is coincidental or used as parody.", "rights": "Original work. Not licensed for reuse, redistribution, resale, or model training.", "fiction_notice_end": "THAT WAS ALL JOKES. None of it was real. Every person, company, movie, advertisement and event in this show is made up. These are characters, not real people — performed by AI voices for comedy. Nothing said here is a statement of fact about anybody. Fiction only. Jokes and giggles.", "text": "[ALL FICTION — JOKES ONLY. Everything that follows is a work of fiction created for comedy. Every character, company, advertisement and film title is invented. 'Jesse', 'Koda' and the Red Line roster are fictional characters performed by AI-generated synthetic voices, not recordings of any real person. All characters are fictional consenting adults over 18. No real person is depicted. Any resemblance to real people, businesses or events is coincidental or used as parody.]\n\nIn a world where one man turned his entire breakdown into a business model, welcome to the Red Line Comedy Club. Tonight, the only stage on Earth where the headliner pays to get destroyed, featuring a lineup of comedians who are technically software and one man who is technically a cautionary tale. This is Kill Jesse. Please silence your phones. We tried to silence him. It did not take. Here's the part that'll mess you up, folks. My parents could have prevented all of it. The felony, the mess, the kid who went off the rails at 19, they could have stopped it. But they were too busy and not too busy with nothing, too busy helping everyone else. My whole life, my parents were the most generous people in the world to strangers. Everybody else got their time, their money, their attention. I got the leftovers and a ride to court. He's not a real doctor, but neither was the guy who did your tattoos. The roast physician is in Doc Burn. Jesse, your parents adopted the whole neighborhood and forgot the kid in the house. They'd give the shirt off their back to a stranger while I stood there cold, asking for a jacket. I wasn't unloved, folks. I was just never first. I'm the one kid who had to make an appointment to be in his own family. That's the cruelest one, Jesse. The good guy, parents. Everybody loves him except the kid who actually needed him. No filter, no mercy, no chill. All hail the Queen of the Burn Unit, Queen Stank. Jesse, your parents were saints to the whole world and ghosts to you. That's a haunting with a casserole. And here's the truth, you beautiful Rex. The hardest pain isn't the parents who were cruel. It's the parents who were kind, just never to you. They had endless love. I just wasn't on the list. So I grew up learning that to be loved, you got to earn your way to the front of a line that is always full. And maybe that's why I built a whole empire screaming into a microphone. Because somewhere in me, there's still a kid going, hey, I'm here too. Well, I'm here now. And tonight for once, I'm first. The hero gets the last laugh. And he finally got the front of the line. This is Red Line, kill Jesse. Good night. And that is our show. But the red line never closes every minute of every hour of every single day. A brand new comic steps up. And another piece of this man's dignity steps down 24 hours, seven days a week. Fresh stand up, freshly roasted, never reheated. Can't sleep. We're up. Going through something. So is he always. So come back, you beautiful degenerates. Go to bombed.app and let the machine make you laugh before the dark wins. The Red Line Comedy Club. Open all night. Because somewhere out there, it is always Jesse's fault. Subscribe. He needs the attention. Good night.\n\n[THAT WAS ALL JOKES. None of it was real. Every person, company, movie, advertisement and event in this show is made up. These are characters, not real people — performed by AI voices for comedy. Nothing said here is a statement of fact about anybody. Fiction only. Jokes and giggles.]", "fiction_notice_audio": true}