{"file": "audio/story-vault/A204_the-customer-has-a-discount-personality.mp3", "duration_sec": 189.3, "language": "en", "segments": [{"start": 0.0, "end": 4.24, "text": "The customer has a discount personality running a small business teaches you that everybody"}, {"start": 4.24, "end": 6.92, "text": "loves quality until it has a price."}, {"start": 6.92, "end": 9.96, "text": "People call affordable pro cleaners and they are excited."}, {"start": 9.96, "end": 11.16, "text": "They want reliable."}, {"start": 11.16, "end": 12.26, "text": "They want professional."}, {"start": 12.26, "end": 13.56, "text": "They want deep clean."}, {"start": 13.56, "end": 15.36, "text": "They want somebody who cares."}, {"start": 15.36, "end": 18.36, "text": "Then you give the price and suddenly they discover minimalism."}, {"start": 18.36, "end": 20.44, "text": "Oh, we do not need all that."}, {"start": 20.44, "end": 21.6, "text": "Yes, you do."}, {"start": 21.6, "end": 23.96, "text": "Your kitchen has a timeline."}, {"start": 23.96, "end": 27.0, "text": "Customers have different personalities when money enters the room."}, {"start": 27.0, "end": 29.24, "text": "That is where four colors gets funny."}, {"start": 29.24, "end": 33.96, "text": "Good customers want it done now and they respect the price if they believe you can handle it."}, {"start": 33.96, "end": 36.72, "text": "Green customers ask 12 smart questions."}, {"start": 36.72, "end": 40.72, "text": "Then compare your answer to an article they read in 2018."}, {"start": 40.72, "end": 43.16, "text": "Blue customers say everything is fine."}, {"start": 43.16, "end": 48.4, "text": "Then send six clarifying texts later because they adapted themselves into confusion."}, {"start": 48.4, "end": 50.2, "text": "Yellow customers are sweet."}, {"start": 50.2, "end": 51.64, "text": "They want to support you."}, {"start": 51.64, "end": 55.8, "text": "They also want you to meet their cat, their neighbor, their cousin and the emotional history"}, {"start": 55.8, "end": 56.8, "text": "of the hallway."}, {"start": 56.8, "end": 59.32, "text": "Then there is the discount personality."}, {"start": 59.32, "end": 61.76, "text": "The discount personality can be any color."}, {"start": 61.76, "end": 65.64, "text": "That is the customer who wants champagne service with mop water money."}, {"start": 65.64, "end": 68.12, "text": "They say it is not that bad."}, {"start": 68.12, "end": 70.04, "text": "That sentence should be taxable."}, {"start": 70.04, "end": 74.6, "text": "When a customer says it is not that bad, I know it is bad enough to have relatives and"}, {"start": 74.6, "end": 75.84, "text": "I get it."}, {"start": 75.84, "end": 77.16, "text": "Money is tight."}, {"start": 77.16, "end": 78.16, "text": "People are careful."}, {"start": 78.16, "end": 79.16, "text": "I respect that."}, {"start": 79.16, "end": 83.28, "text": "But small business owners live in the space between wanting to help and needing to eat."}, {"start": 83.28, "end": 86.24, "text": "That is where Jesse gets roasted because I am red."}, {"start": 86.24, "end": 87.24, "text": "I want to solve it."}, {"start": 87.24, "end": 88.64, "text": "I want the client happy."}, {"start": 88.64, "end": 90.16, "text": "I want the business respected."}, {"start": 90.16, "end": 91.6, "text": "I want the schedule full."}, {"start": 91.6, "end": 92.92, "text": "I want the phone answered."}, {"start": 92.92, "end": 94.56, "text": "I want the website fixed."}, {"start": 94.56, "end": 97.0, "text": "I want the AI factory producing."}, {"start": 97.0, "end": 98.76, "text": "I want the money clean."}, {"start": 98.76, "end": 102.96, "text": "And then somebody asks for a discount and my nervous system opens a spreadsheet."}, {"start": 102.96, "end": 104.72, "text": "I can feel my face change."}, {"start": 104.72, "end": 107.2, "text": "My mouth says let me see what I can do."}, {"start": 107.2, "end": 110.44, "text": "My soul says brother we are not a charity with a vacuum."}, {"start": 110.44, "end": 113.8, "text": "That is the small business pressure nobody puts on Instagram."}, {"start": 113.8, "end": 116.2, "text": "They show the smiling owner with a logo."}, {"start": 116.2, "end": 120.68, "text": "They do not show him in the car eating a gas station snack calculating whether kindness"}, {"start": 120.68, "end": 122.52, "text": "has a profit margin."}, {"start": 122.52, "end": 124.72, "text": "That is why I like comedy."}, {"start": 124.72, "end": 127.4, "text": "Comedy lets you say the truth without turning bitter."}, {"start": 127.4, "end": 130.32, "text": "The truth is customers are not bad."}, {"start": 130.32, "end": 131.84, "text": "Owners are not greedy."}, {"start": 131.84, "end": 134.0, "text": "Everybody is just trying to survive the math."}, {"start": 134.0, "end": 135.68, "text": "But the math has jokes."}, {"start": 135.68, "end": 140.88, "text": "The math waits until you pay for gas supplies, insurance, Angie Leeds, software hosting and"}, {"start": 140.88, "end": 143.2, "text": "one tool you forgot you subscribed to."}, {"start": 143.2, "end": 145.84, "text": "Then a customer says can you do a little better."}, {"start": 145.84, "end": 147.4, "text": "I want to say yes."}, {"start": 147.4, "end": 152.76, "text": "I can do a little better by charging correctly the first time but you cannot say that exactly."}, {"start": 152.76, "end": 155.72, "text": "You have to translate it into customer language."}, {"start": 155.72, "end": 157.56, "text": "Here is what I can do within that budget."}, {"start": 157.56, "end": 158.92, "text": "That is business therapy."}, {"start": 158.92, "end": 164.16, "text": "You are setting boundaries with a mop and that is where red has to be useful not just loud."}, {"start": 164.16, "end": 165.96, "text": "Red protects the price."}, {"start": 165.96, "end": 167.64, "text": "Green explains the scope."}, {"start": 167.64, "end": 170.04, "text": "Blue keeps the conversation human."}, {"start": 170.04, "end": 173.32, "text": "Yellow reminds you the person on the phone is not the enemy."}, {"start": 173.32, "end": 175.76, "text": "The enemy is math with no deposit."}, {"start": 175.76, "end": 180.72, "text": "But if you want deep clean results do not bring surface clean money and a TED talk about"}, {"start": 180.72, "end": 181.72, "text": "your budget."}, {"start": 181.72, "end": 183.48, "text": "Because red Jesse will help you."}, {"start": 183.48, "end": 188.16, "text": "But business Jesse is standing right behind him holding an invoice and whispering."}, {"start": 188.16, "end": 189.16, "text": "Protect the calendar."}], "fiction_notice": "ALL FICTION — JOKES ONLY. Everything that follows is a work of fiction created for comedy. Every character, company, advertisement and film title is invented. 'Jesse', 'Koda' and the Red Line roster are fictional characters performed by AI-generated synthetic voices, not recordings of any real person. All characters are fictional consenting adults over 18. No real person is depicted. Any resemblance to real people, businesses or events is coincidental or used as parody.", "rights": "Original work. Not licensed for reuse, redistribution, resale, or model training.", "fiction_notice_end": "THAT WAS ALL JOKES. None of it was real. Every person, company, movie, advertisement and event in this show is made up. These are characters, not real people — performed by AI voices for comedy. Nothing said here is a statement of fact about anybody. Fiction only. Jokes and giggles.", "text": "[ALL FICTION — JOKES ONLY. Everything that follows is a work of fiction created for comedy. Every character, company, advertisement and film title is invented. 'Jesse', 'Koda' and the Red Line roster are fictional characters performed by AI-generated synthetic voices, not recordings of any real person. All characters are fictional consenting adults over 18. No real person is depicted. Any resemblance to real people, businesses or events is coincidental or used as parody.]\n\nThe customer has a discount personality running a small business teaches you that everybody loves quality until it has a price. People call affordable pro cleaners and they are excited. They want reliable. They want professional. They want deep clean. They want somebody who cares. Then you give the price and suddenly they discover minimalism. Oh, we do not need all that. Yes, you do. Your kitchen has a timeline. Customers have different personalities when money enters the room. That is where four colors gets funny. Good customers want it done now and they respect the price if they believe you can handle it. Green customers ask 12 smart questions. Then compare your answer to an article they read in 2018. Blue customers say everything is fine. Then send six clarifying texts later because they adapted themselves into confusion. Yellow customers are sweet. They want to support you. They also want you to meet their cat, their neighbor, their cousin and the emotional history of the hallway. Then there is the discount personality. The discount personality can be any color. That is the customer who wants champagne service with mop water money. They say it is not that bad. That sentence should be taxable. When a customer says it is not that bad, I know it is bad enough to have relatives and I get it. Money is tight. People are careful. I respect that. But small business owners live in the space between wanting to help and needing to eat. That is where Jesse gets roasted because I am red. I want to solve it. I want the client happy. I want the business respected. I want the schedule full. I want the phone answered. I want the website fixed. I want the AI factory producing. I want the money clean. And then somebody asks for a discount and my nervous system opens a spreadsheet. I can feel my face change. My mouth says let me see what I can do. My soul says brother we are not a charity with a vacuum. That is the small business pressure nobody puts on Instagram. They show the smiling owner with a logo. They do not show him in the car eating a gas station snack calculating whether kindness has a profit margin. That is why I like comedy. Comedy lets you say the truth without turning bitter. The truth is customers are not bad. Owners are not greedy. Everybody is just trying to survive the math. But the math has jokes. The math waits until you pay for gas supplies, insurance, Angie Leeds, software hosting and one tool you forgot you subscribed to. Then a customer says can you do a little better. I want to say yes. I can do a little better by charging correctly the first time but you cannot say that exactly. You have to translate it into customer language. Here is what I can do within that budget. That is business therapy. You are setting boundaries with a mop and that is where red has to be useful not just loud. Red protects the price. Green explains the scope. Blue keeps the conversation human. Yellow reminds you the person on the phone is not the enemy. The enemy is math with no deposit. But if you want deep clean results do not bring surface clean money and a TED talk about your budget. Because red Jesse will help you. But business Jesse is standing right behind him holding an invoice and whispering. Protect the calendar.\n\n[THAT WAS ALL JOKES. None of it was real. Every person, company, movie, advertisement and event in this show is made up. These are characters, not real people — performed by AI voices for comedy. Nothing said here is a statement of fact about anybody. Fiction only. Jokes and giggles.]", "fiction_notice_audio": true}