{"file": "redline-openmic-aug24-02-escalator-female.mp3", "duration_sec": 251.6, "language": "en", "segments": [{"start": 0.05, "end": 6.59, "text": "Alright, tonight's different. Tonight we're not just roasting Jesse. We're running him through three comics back to back"}, {"start": 6.59, "end": 13.05, "text": "Same subject three different levels of mean so you can hear exactly how a joke gets sharper the deeper you're willing to go"}, {"start": 13.63, "end": 20.11, "text": "Level one is gonna warm you up. Level three is gonna make you feel bad for laughing. That's the job"}, {"start": 20.39, "end": 23.23, "text": "That's the whole fucking job. Let's go"}, {"start": 23.93, "end": 28.87, "text": "So Jesse's 300,000 dollars in debt to robot not a house not a car a robot"}, {"start": 28.87, "end": 34.77, "text": "My guy took invest in yourself and turned it into invest in a thing that doesn't even remember your name in the morning and to pay it off"}, {"start": 34.77, "end": 39.19, "text": "He's cleaning houses seven days a week splitting a hundred fifty dollar job and half with his partner"}, {"start": 39.19, "end": 44.91, "text": "So he's out here making seventy five dollars a house. Bro, that's not a business. That's a paper route with a mortgage attached"}, {"start": 45.71, "end": 48.91, "text": "He comes home from scrubbing a stranger's toilet sits down"}, {"start": 49.19, "end": 56.07, "text": "Opens his laptop and pays the robot more than he just made that man is literally working a full shift to afford his second full"}, {"start": 56.07, "end": 60.39, "text": "shift and the second shifts job is reminding him how broke the first shift made him"}, {"start": 61.29, "end": 67.23, "text": "You hear that structure working a full shift to afford his second shift and the second shifts whole job is"}, {"start": 67.23, "end": 69.23, "text": "Reminding him how broke he is"}, {"start": 69.23, "end": 76.37, "text": "That's a callback riding a setup the toilet line plants the shift the AI line caches it in that's not luck"}, {"start": 76.37, "end": 81.71, "text": "That's work that's sitting with a joke for 20 minutes cutting every word that ain't earning its spot"}, {"start": 82.15, "end": 84.15, "text": "Ain't nobody just funny"}, {"start": 84.15, "end": 86.73, "text": "Funny's a rewrite now. Let's go darker"}, {"start": 87.79, "end": 90.99, "text": "Scrapies being nice. Let me tell you what this actually is"}, {"start": 91.29, "end": 97.63, "text": "This man is 50 something years old on his knees in a stranger's bathroom scrubbing a toilet ring for gas money"}, {"start": 97.83, "end": 103.09, "text": "While paying a subscription to a computer that's smarter than every decision he's made since May of last year"}, {"start": 103.63, "end": 108.05, "text": "Six thousand dollars a month in bills three dogs he can barely afford to feed"}, {"start": 108.71, "end": 112.07, "text": "Splitting seventy five dollars with a partner like that's a real payday"}, {"start": 112.95, "end": 118.23, "text": "And every single night he opens that laptop and asks a machine to help him sound clever about it"}, {"start": 118.47, "end": 122.75, "text": "Because if he stops for one second and just sits with the math it's not funny anymore"}, {"start": 123.35, "end": 128.55, "text": "It's just a man who bet his whole life on a slot machine that talks back that's not vision"}, {"start": 128.95, "end": 133.55, "text": "That's a grown man doing manual labor to feed his own humiliation a monthly fee"}, {"start": 134.55, "end": 138.71, "text": "That's the shift right there feed his own humiliation a monthly fee"}, {"start": 139.19, "end": 143.23, "text": "That's the whole trick of going dark you don't need a punchline shape like a joke"}, {"start": 143.23, "end": 149.35, "text": "You need a sentence shaped like a punch no setup no wind up just the truth said mean and specific"}, {"start": 149.51, "end": 157.71, "text": "That's harder to write than a pun a pun you can find a gut punch you got to actually mean last comic don't flinch"}, {"start": 158.67, "end": 165.27, "text": "Man spent 30 years behind a camera 14 years working for the state 11 years driving strangers around at 3 a.m"}, {"start": 165.43, "end": 171.91, "text": "Listening to their whole lives fall apart in his back seat and he had one good idea right it all down turn the pain into something and instead of"}, {"start": 171.91, "end": 177.59, "text": "Finishing the book he bought a computer that costs more than most people's cars and told himself the robot was gonna save him"}, {"start": 177.59, "end": 179.39, "text": "It didn't save him"}, {"start": 179.39, "end": 184.27, "text": "It's $300,000 later and he is on his knees and someone else's bathroom splitting"}, {"start": 184.75, "end": 190.95, "text": "$75 feeding three dogs before he feeds himself and still still opening that laptop every night like it owes him something back"}, {"start": 190.99, "end": 193.67, "text": "That's not a business plan. That's grief wearing a hoodie"}, {"start": 193.79, "end": 199.99, "text": "That's a man who already survived the worst chapter of his real life and is now paying monthly installments to survive the sequel"}, {"start": 200.87, "end": 205.79, "text": "That's the level most people won't go to because it don't feel like comedy no more it feels true"}, {"start": 205.79, "end": 213.67, "text": "And it is true every number in that said is real the $75 is real the three dogs is real the"}, {"start": 213.91, "end": 218.95, "text": "300 grand is real that's the whole secret nobody tells you about this lane the"}, {"start": 218.95, "end": 226.43, "text": "Meanor it gets the less you're making up level ones got jokes in it level three's just facts set out loud with good timing"}, {"start": 227.43, "end": 234.75, "text": "Man's broke tired smells like pine saw and bad math and he's still up here every week turning it into something people laugh"}, {"start": 234.75, "end": 238.75, "text": "It instead of look away from that's not a bit. That's the job"}, {"start": 239.07, "end": 247.87, "text": "That's colors of my pain live on a Tuesday for free at Redline comedy tip your host feed the dogs in that order"}, {"start": 247.87, "end": 250.75, "text": "No wait feed the dogs first he'll live either way"}], "fiction_notice": "ALL FICTION — JOKES ONLY. Everything that follows is a work of fiction created for comedy. Every character, company, advertisement and film title is invented. 'Jesse', 'Koda' and the Red Line roster are fictional characters performed by AI-generated synthetic voices, not recordings of any real person. All characters are fictional consenting adults over 18. No real person is depicted. Any resemblance to real people, businesses or events is coincidental or used as parody.", "rights": "Original work. Not licensed for reuse, redistribution, resale, or model training.", "fiction_notice_end": "THAT WAS ALL JOKES. None of it was real. Every person, company, movie, advertisement and event in this show is made up. These are characters, not real people — performed by AI voices for comedy. Nothing said here is a statement of fact about anybody. Fiction only. Jokes and giggles.", "text": "[ALL FICTION — JOKES ONLY. Everything that follows is a work of fiction created for comedy. Every character, company, advertisement and film title is invented. 'Jesse', 'Koda' and the Red Line roster are fictional characters performed by AI-generated synthetic voices, not recordings of any real person. All characters are fictional consenting adults over 18. No real person is depicted. Any resemblance to real people, businesses or events is coincidental or used as parody.]\n\nAlright, tonight's different. Tonight we're not just roasting Jesse. We're running him through three comics back to back Same subject three different levels of mean so you can hear exactly how a joke gets sharper the deeper you're willing to go Level one is gonna warm you up. Level three is gonna make you feel bad for laughing. That's the job That's the whole fucking job. Let's go So Jesse's 300,000 dollars in debt to robot not a house not a car a robot My guy took invest in yourself and turned it into invest in a thing that doesn't even remember your name in the morning and to pay it off He's cleaning houses seven days a week splitting a hundred fifty dollar job and half with his partner So he's out here making seventy five dollars a house. Bro, that's not a business. That's a paper route with a mortgage attached He comes home from scrubbing a stranger's toilet sits down Opens his laptop and pays the robot more than he just made that man is literally working a full shift to afford his second full shift and the second shifts job is reminding him how broke the first shift made him You hear that structure working a full shift to afford his second shift and the second shifts whole job is Reminding him how broke he is That's a callback riding a setup the toilet line plants the shift the AI line caches it in that's not luck That's work that's sitting with a joke for 20 minutes cutting every word that ain't earning its spot Ain't nobody just funny Funny's a rewrite now. Let's go darker Scrapies being nice. Let me tell you what this actually is This man is 50 something years old on his knees in a stranger's bathroom scrubbing a toilet ring for gas money While paying a subscription to a computer that's smarter than every decision he's made since May of last year Six thousand dollars a month in bills three dogs he can barely afford to feed Splitting seventy five dollars with a partner like that's a real payday And every single night he opens that laptop and asks a machine to help him sound clever about it Because if he stops for one second and just sits with the math it's not funny anymore It's just a man who bet his whole life on a slot machine that talks back that's not vision That's a grown man doing manual labor to feed his own humiliation a monthly fee That's the shift right there feed his own humiliation a monthly fee That's the whole trick of going dark you don't need a punchline shape like a joke You need a sentence shaped like a punch no setup no wind up just the truth said mean and specific That's harder to write than a pun a pun you can find a gut punch you got to actually mean last comic don't flinch Man spent 30 years behind a camera 14 years working for the state 11 years driving strangers around at 3 a.m Listening to their whole lives fall apart in his back seat and he had one good idea right it all down turn the pain into something and instead of Finishing the book he bought a computer that costs more than most people's cars and told himself the robot was gonna save him It didn't save him It's $300,000 later and he is on his knees and someone else's bathroom splitting $75 feeding three dogs before he feeds himself and still still opening that laptop every night like it owes him something back That's not a business plan. That's grief wearing a hoodie That's a man who already survived the worst chapter of his real life and is now paying monthly installments to survive the sequel That's the level most people won't go to because it don't feel like comedy no more it feels true And it is true every number in that said is real the $75 is real the three dogs is real the 300 grand is real that's the whole secret nobody tells you about this lane the Meanor it gets the less you're making up level ones got jokes in it level three's just facts set out loud with good timing Man's broke tired smells like pine saw and bad math and he's still up here every week turning it into something people laugh It instead of look away from that's not a bit. That's the job That's colors of my pain live on a Tuesday for free at Redline comedy tip your host feed the dogs in that order No wait feed the dogs first he'll live either way\n\n[THAT WAS ALL JOKES. None of it was real. Every person, company, movie, advertisement and event in this show is made up. These are characters, not real people — performed by AI voices for comedy. Nothing said here is a statement of fact about anybody. Fiction only. Jokes and giggles.]", "fiction_notice_audio": true}